My Husband, the Guru


I swear I think my husband has become my guru.  As I have written, he has been in the hospital with a mass on his brain.  We are running on 3-4 months now he has been in the hospital.  With all this has come an unexpected change.  His personality and worldview has changed.

I have to admit initially, I was not sure about this...wondering if this was even the same man with whom I fell in love.  Before he was quiet, reserved, very private, did not like to go to new places, nor try new things.  Now he has a passion for life, new foods, new places, exploring and enjoying life for every succulent drop.

My life has changed in the past few months as well.  I get up, go to work, then go to the hospital until it is time to go home and go to bed, only to repeat this the next day.  But being with him day in and day out, outside of our comfort zone of our home has been a purifying fire.  I am learning to love and serve him as God.  In turn he teaches me how to live and approach life.  For example, his family had very little to do with him for the 16 years we have been together.  Now, having him so close to death several times, they have realized their mistakes and really opened their heart and lives to him. What is amazing is there is no grudge left in him.  All these years, he has been hurt by their lack of affection (real or perceived) and without so much as a thought he has forgiven them (and me!) our faults of the past.

He is teaching me to live, to be open, and to enjoy life.  I only hope we have another 40 years together to explore the adventure of life holding hands together.  My husband has become the wisdom of the Divine Mother to me.  He has become my guru, my teacher, my love.  And for that I am so thankful for our time together.


Comments

  1. As The Living Jesus tells us "this Heaven shall pass away, and so too shall the one above." Grappling with the reality of impermanence can be daunting; I am glad to see you've found your footing.

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