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Showing posts from March, 2012

The Beloved is All in All

I find myself longing for simplicity.  I stepped out in the dark of the moon the past few nights.  I feel the presence of the Beloved and that is enough.  I am rejuvenated and refreshed.  Who is the Beloved?  He is God  many and yet one.  One Divine Essence and Energy filling all things.. personal and impersonal.  There are so many ways I experience the Beloved, and each one precious.  I do not need elaborate liturgies, as beautiful as many of them are.  I often simply walk in the sun or moonlight and thus fulfill my vows as priest and a simple monk.  I can light a candle and feel the Beloved's presence.  I am thankful for these simple graces..a thousand simple graces...and this is enough. Perhaps this is what the Gospel of Thomas was talking about all along and I missed what was right in front of my face.

Praising the Dawn

Standing out among the dew washed grass this morning I praised the Dawn.

All praise to you Rising Sun in the East.  All praise to the Eastern dawn.  Spirit of the Morning Air I praise you. Power of Inspiration, Hope, and the Inquiring Mind.  You of new beginnings and the wind on the breeze, I praise you!  I praise you! God is all in all!

Mornings

A beautiful waning moon is in the still dark sky.  Clouds blow quickly past her.  A coolness has fallen during the night.  Last night, stars shown so brightly, I just stood in awe.  Can you hear all nature whisper?

Change, Frustation, and Peace

I, like many people do not like change.  Part of me completely craves it as a sign of growth and moving away from stagnation,  but as soon as I take a step I want the comfort of the known.  The religious community I belong to is undergoing massive change.  We are moving away from the Gnostic label as we keep finding the word to be a stumbling block with others.  Some assume we are like the Themites, ,the Weor Gnostics, the Sylvia Browne Gnostics, or even folks trying to reconstruct the ancient groups labeled Gnostics.  None of these were true.  Also add to that, that we all seemed to grow beyond just the Nag Hammadi, exploring other religious traditions etc, that the label of Gnostic even from that perspective may not have been the best label.

As we as a religious community work through who we are, what we are about, and even what to call ourselves, our need for being heard can come through too strongly.  Our opinions become sacred writ that leads us to defensiveness if anyone dare ha…

Wandering

I left for work this morning before the sun was up, as is my habit.  Not too many people go to work an hour early daily, but for me it serves to help me ground and get ready for the day.  The stars were out but hidden by clouds.  A humidity filled the air leaving the windows on my car covered with dew.  As I walked out I greeted that of God in the large oak in front of my house and the slight breeze that blew.

I have to admit I feel a bit lost.  The Gospel of Thomas has been my foundation for so long.  It has been a source of inspiration to me and how I view the world.  I am a reader, I have to admit I love having scripture, and feel like I am wandering without a map.  I am a simple Pilgrim on a pilgrimage.  I have not arrived but I am learning to find inspiration on the way.


Animism and Ritual

Wikipedia has a working definition of Animism that I like very well.

Animism encompasses the beliefs that there is no separation between the spiritual and physical (or material) world, and souls or spirits exist, not only in humans, but also in all other animals, plants, rocks, natural phenomena such as thunder, geographic features such as mountains or rivers, or other entities of the natural environment.Animism may further attribute souls to abstract concepts such as words, true names, or metaphors in mythology. Examples of Animism can be found in forms of Shinto,Hinduism, Buddhism, Pantheism, Paganism, and Neopaganism.  Source:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Animism So the Gospel of Thomas pointed the way of my Animism.  Then came the experience of everything being alive with its unique expression of the Spirit.  This is all well and good, but what does this mean?  How is this lived?  I have been asking myself these questions, and am only in the infancy stage of what this looks like fo…

Rediscovering Awe

Whatever happened that sense of magic and awe in nature?  Where is that sense of mystery in the dark?  Can you hear the whispers in the wind?

Run Quick! Here Comes Change!

I hate making big decisions.  I get paralyzed into inaction, utterly unable to move.  I question my previous post, asking am I sure?  What will others think?  Should I move it to drafts?

I also received a job offer from a competitor.  I have a friend that moved to that company last year and loves it.  The idea of changing is so scary.  There are so many What ifs!

Do you have troubles making decisions?  Do you get the deer in the headlight look when it comes to taking a step into change?

The Leaf Flew Away

I have tried. I really have. I never thought I would be at this pont. But I am. Since my spiritual experience several months ago, (see http://nitecaravan.blogspot.com/2011/07/confession.html) my belief system has fallen apart. I wanted to believe in Jesus. I really did. I had found a faith that allowed me so many freedoms with the Gospel of Thomas, but this experience shattered all that.

     I thought the feeling would pass, as all things do. But having learned to read, can a person unlearn it? I talked to those in my faith community and they suggested that I did not see or need Jesus in this experience because in some way I had merged with him, seeing through his eyes in this life changing experience I had. I wanted to believe this so badly. I picked up my Thomasine and Christian theology and devotional books to study and pray. Yet it felt so contrived and unnatural, like fitting a square peg in a round hole.

      Tonight as I prepared to again bring myself to study …

Original Innocence

Beauty is my religion.
Nature is my scripture.
Life lived well is my creed.