An Authentic Faith

There is a saying in the Gospel of Thomas that says when you know yourself you will be known.  For me as a Thomasine Christian and really reflecting on things the past few months have really made this saying hit home for me.  This faith journey requires authenticity.  It is not one for pious platitudes or the fake smile I used to glue on in my stricter fundamentalist days.  It requires an unflinching look at oneself, and wow what a mixed bag that can be!  In sitting in silent contemplation in the Divine presence, it is as if God were holding a mirror back on me.  I see my mind jumping like a monkey from thought branch to thought branch.  Then I observe a pattern in my mind's wanderings.  Like a broken record, it replays past events and shapes and guides my thoughts and feelings like a dog on a leash.  It is only through seeing these that I can even address these things.. events in the past that still cause a limp in my journey.  Some of these can be let go, others are a part of my woundedness that leaves me broken open before God.  In seeing myself a little clearer, I find I am better able to know and be known by God.

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